@utumn$ummer

"i love my hands but it hurts to pray..."

Abigail Doan [circa aug '07]

these next few weeks.....are my ABSOLUTE favorite of the year.

maybe that's why I always end up spending them with my heart open....

 can u blame me?

 

thank u

for just listening and understanding.

a weight has been lifted.

i want to feel the vulnerability and the pleasure and i guess even the pain....because that's life. and i surprise even myself to say that you are still the only one i can feel that way with. all i want is to be understood, to feel like i'm not alone and that it's ok to be who i am and that is the best form of freedom for me.


it's like you have this wire that connects to my brain and my heart and i don't know how you got access to it. i guess you were born with it. sometimes it isnt fair but most of the time it's a blessing.

i get angry that you have it and i want to say 'give me that back' because that's me closing off. that's me feeling like no one should have access to me because then they have access to hurting me and i do NOT want to be hurt the way i was.

but in a sense, i feel like i never really can be hurt that way again. because no matter what, you'll always have that wire....so i'll never be alone.

thank u

like someone read my mind